


Charlie Kelly: Ghoulbuster

by Heroes EU (Heroes_EU)



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2016-05-01
Packaged: 2018-06-05 17:22:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6713938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heroes_EU/pseuds/Heroes%20EU
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Strange things have been going on at Paddy's Pub and Charlie suspects it's all down to ghouls. Now he just has to prove it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Charlie Kelly: Ghoulbuster

**Author's Note:**

> I've only posted the pre-title teaser so far. I did title it as chapter 1: Intro but I guess chapter names don't appear unless you post more than one chapter. I will have the entire thing up within a couple of days. I just wanted to make it known that this isn't the entire story.

_2:30pm_.

_On a Wednesday._

Charlie and Mac sat in front of the bar, each sipping on a glass of beer. It wasn't their first of the day. Dee stood behind the bar, working.

"That is ridiculous, dude, there's no way." Mac said in disbelief.

"It's true!" Charlie shrieked.

"There is no way you saw a rat the size of Frank," Mac said before drinking some beer.

"It's just not possible," Dee added.

Charlie and Mac turned to Dee, the looks on their faces almost close to offended.

"Dee, what are you doing?" Mac asked.

"Working. Cleaning glasses, slicing lemons. You know, bar stuff."

"Well first of all, stay out of our conversation. Second, you're doing that at the same time?"

Dee self-consciously looked down at her work. "Yeah, why?"

"Why would you do that?" Mac asked, his voice getting higher with every word.

"Do one then the other, Dee. You can't do them at the same time, you're just getting lemon juice all over the glasses," Charlie chugs the rest of his beer. "Now they need washing again. That's just silly."

"It's a joke, that's what it is."

Dee throws the rag on the bar. "Oh I'm sorry. I'm the only one here actually doing any work but apparently it's not good enough. How about you dickbags try doing it for a change while I sit on my ass and get drunk all day?"

"Shut up and get us more beer, bitch," Mac said, sliding his glass to her.

Their little spat was interrupted when Frank stumbled through the door covered in bleeding cuts. The others looked at him in shock.

"What the hell happened to you, Frank?" Mac asked.

"It was that goddamn rat." Frank walked to the bar pointing his finger at Charlie. "Something's gotta be done about that thing, Charlie." Without thought he turned to Dee, "Deandra get me a beer," he said turning back to the boys and continued without any change in flow. "That giant bastard is a psychopath."

"Wait so there really is a giant rat?" Mac said.

"I told you, man," Charlie replied.

"Dee, where is our beer?" Mac snapped.

"I'm pouring you all some beer, Jesus Christ."

"That does it!" Dennis yelled from the office.

"Has he been here this whole time?" Charlie muttered to the equally confused group.

Dennis stormed out of the office and approached the gang. "Alright morons, you've had your fun but it needs to stop. I can't concentrate back there."

"What are you talking about?" Dee said.

"All those stupid noises you keep making."

"We're not making any noises" Mac added.

In the short moment of silence, the gang heard a thud followed by a faint groaning.

"There it is," Dennis said.

"I've been hearing that for a few weeks now," Dee said looking up at the ceiling.

"Yeah, a bunch of other weird things have been happening too. A bunch of my stuff has been stolen. I thought it was one of you guys, that's why I stole Frank's gun..." Mac stopped and looked at the floor in shame and fear. "To threaten you all," he added quietly.

"What do you think is doing it?" Dee asked.

"More monster rats!" Frank panicked.

Dennis looked confused. "Don't be stupid."

"Dennis is right, this isn't rats," Charlie said.

"Of course it's not," Dennis interrupted.

"I think I know exactly what's going on here," Charlie continued.

Mac sighed. "I know where this is going. Don't bother, bro."

"Ghouls," Charlie said with a childish grin.

 

_"Charlie Kelly: Ghoulbuster"_


End file.
